When Telemarketing Attacks
Telemarketing is not dead. I have proof. Well, I have proof people are still trying it at least.
Of course there are still common sense uses for telemarketing, but with the onset of digital messaging, I see its use and utility becoming a little like that of the FAX machine. I still have a FAX number on my business card, but really couldn’t pinpoint the last time it was used.
So, that brings me to today’s little post. While I was at lunch with some close friends, I saw a call come in on my cell phone that I didn’t recognize. Generally, and I’m sorry to those I’ve screened, I don’t answer calls from numbers I don’t readily identify as “friendly.” That may be due to the fact that I used to be the director of a loan collection telemarketing center, or it may simply be that I live in Iowa, where every 4-years-or-so, we become the political solicitation call capital of the world. In any case, if you’ve gone my to voice-mail once and left a “friendly” message, I can guarantee you probably won’t again (unless I’m too busy for real.)
So, I finished lunch and got back to the office to check my messages and I’m assaulted with the following:
Yeah, right?
So, let me smack this poor guy around a little…
- The company (or guy) did a Google search for “Social Media” — maybe even as specific as “Social Media Marketing, Des Moines” and found my Website. BIG DEAL
- He’s reading from a poorly written script. YAWN
- His pitch was vague, broad and unappealing. CLICK
- There was no tangible call-to-action. FAIL
- There was no research or qualification to the call. DUH And
- HE SURE AS HELL KNEW MY NAME IS ANDREW… (he said it 9 times in less than 90 seconds! GOOD LORD! I’m vain, but that’s uncalled for!)
So, what are my takeaways from this little solicitation? Telemarketing can work if you approach it logically.
- Don’t be a robot. If I were to answer, I can only assume this guy would have, without taking a breath, given me the :90 seconds you just heard without engaging me for a second. If you’re going from a script, memorize it and interject sales points and benefits as the conversation progresses. Don’t read to me!
- Be prepared. Sure a Google search and some skimming of a company website may give you the gist of who you’re calling, but with a little deeper dive (LinkedIn, Twitter search, etc.) he could have personalized some of the pitch to make me feel more comfortable that he was stalking me.
- Don’t bury your lead. It took well over :50 seconds (of :90 total) for the “Hook” to be presented. If you want to get someone’s attention, you don’t have time for chit-chat, especially in this day of “Immediate Gratification.” I’ve seen his business model as a start-up happen in less time than it took him to tell me about it. TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE!
- Finally, Leave ‘Em Hangin’… Don’t reveal the hook when leaving a voice-mail… Even when I was collecting student loans, I would leave messages that would make people think they should call back. Not by being deceptive or dishonest, but by feeding enough information to them that calling for the “punch line” seems logical.
Like I said, telemarketing can work, but it has to be used the right way.
Let me know your thoughts. Would YOU have taken this call? Would you have even listened to the enitre message before hitting DELETE?
Food for thought.
Keep Cooking,
Andrew B. Clark
The Brand Chef

I’m not the Motivational Marketing Tooth-fairy or some kind of Communications Cheerleader that’s here to give you a shot to the arm when you’re feeling down. On the contrary, I’ve been there more times than I can count. I’ve been slapped down my defeat. I’ve wallowed with the best of the “wallowers,” and I’ll tell you one thing…

Step 4: “Community” develops retail and consumer tax base
I wonder if missing my friends’ posts and content is just because of the volume of content that is generated by those like Scoble and Brogan or if there has been some kind of fissure in the connection between Google+ and the platforms my “Local Circles” produce content on. I have been dedicated to platforms like Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn for a number of years now, simply because I started and built those networks up from my own social media infancy to a rewarding presence over the past 5 years. But like many I have talked to, I find that Google + is just more noise in the landscape that we’re all trying to understand.









